


The Definition of My Continued Existence

by saint_troll



Series: Jack/Anything that moves... [7]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005), Torchwood
Genre: Drabble, M/M, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-06
Updated: 2013-09-06
Packaged: 2017-12-25 20:20:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/957229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saint_troll/pseuds/saint_troll
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thoughts on one's birthday...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Definition of My Continued Existence

I’m sick of winter and life’s steady progression.  Another year older; all the while it still feels as if I’m standing still.  My face lifted towards the sky, I find nothing but dark clouds.  A flicker of a day a week and then a year.  Pretty soon a decade has gone by and my mind is so full of memories that they all have started to fade away.  Each and every last one of them.  I remember everything yet nothing all at once.

I feel so very old.  Though at times it feels as if  I’m surrounded by the young.  This is not just some game I’m playing at.  Endless routines, habits undying.  Is this what I have to wake up to tomorrow?  And the next day and the next?  I fail to see the meaning in any of it.

Yet, my heart breaks thinking of it ending.  Of no longer having him by my side.  The one distraction that makes life tolerable.  The very definition of my continued existence.  

Memories now fall through my hands like sand.  And sometimes, that alone feels like home; somewhere that I can never find.  Somewhere that is beyond the reach of time and space.  A line never to be crossed.

I loved you and I will never ever be the same again.


End file.
